Bourke Street No Brainer

Today's post is rather a sombre one. For I am at home feeling sorry for myself (and I am sure a lot of Melbourne ladies are sharing my sentiments), having not camped out for eight hours in the cold to be first to walk through the marvellous glass doors that are the gateway to fashion heaven. (Well, possibly fashion hell if you are an outdated Australian fashion retail business still charging exorbitant prices for pieces that are two seasons behind the rest of the world. But fashion heaven for us mere mortals that prefer good quality, fashion-forward pieces for reasonable prices.)

Yes, I did not go to the Zara Melbourne store opening as I had promised myself. As revealed by Fashion Exposed last week, Zara was highlighting a number of key trends in their initial Melbourne collection, and I was all too excited about block colour. Particularly as I feel the block colour trend is the easiest for Melbournites to pick up. Simply purchase a colour jacket/bag/scarf/skirt, add it to your traditional black/grey ensemble et voila - you've walked straight off the catwalk.

For this reason, my heart has been set on the pink blazer (who would have thought?). My only consolation in not being there today to snap up this delight - at least my outfits won't be the same as hundreds of other women who ventured in today (only a small consolation!).

Is that 65% off, or is Marc just happy to see me?

Ah Wednesday the 8th June. I was expecting a rather non-eventful, usual sort of run-of-the-mill day. Instead, after a lengthy sleep in (it was way too cold to get out of bed this morning - and the week doesn't look to be getting much better), I obligingly opened my emails to trawl through the mess that is my inbox.

To my surprise, in amongst the loaded crap that is group buying deals and pointless brands' emails that I probably signed up for to enter some sort of competition, I found an absolute gem from Missy Confidential.  And that big fat flaming blue sapphire was THE OUTNET HAS MARC JACOBS AT UP TO 65% OFF!!

And I am not talking about the diffusion Marc by Marc Jacobs line (which I do also highly covet as does my credit card), but the real deal, genuine, hot stuff, usually beyond-my-budget Marc Jacobs. Yes, it's true. And automatically my eye was drawn to this Sequinned floral-print linen-blend jacket. Having purchased a super cute, structured bell skirt in a deep green brocade from Cue yesterday, this jacket would be the perfect complement to the classed-up clash outfit I am planning, a la Blair Waldorf.

So where would I rather be on this chilly Wednesday? Anywhere - as long as I had access to wireless and could continue to keep shopping up a Marc Jacobs up to 65% off storm. Which is exactly where I am right now - winner.

Hot Pink - hot!

It's no secret that I love Net-a-porter. And it's no secret that my bank must also love Net-a-porter, for they make plenty of dollars off my credit card fees as I am forever hitting the 'Add to Shopping Bag' button and not the 'Add to Wish List' button. (Meanwhile - has anyone figured out how to automatically press the wish list button rather than the shopping bag button yet? I think it's called Willpower, and I reckon the site has some sort of magic power that means all willpower is diminished when browsing. And I think that magic power is called having an awesome range that's easy to buy and is delivered in pretty packaging that makes you feel special).

Yet - I digress. What I love most about Net-a-porter is that the clever buying team there knows exactly what I love, and manages to find items that incorporate multiple style characteristics that I cherish. Hence the reason for today's Monday Morning Eye Candy - the Lanvin Horsehoe heel patent leather pumps.

Although it is quite obvious why it has made the cut for today's MMEC, I will highlight the points just to be clear on why these are so spectacular:

1. They are hot pink. I love hot pink, but feel the awesomeness of hot pink can only be appreciated in small bursts, such as in accessories, like this killer pair of heels.

2. They have a platform. I love platforms. Platforms allow me to wear heels that are much higher than my poor weak ankles can usually take.

3. They have a metallic inner heel. Small hints or accents of metallic make me happy.

4. They look simple on first glance, but after closer inspection you notice there are a lot more subtle (but amazing) features to this shoe. Like a good murder mystery on SVU,  I love things that are more than what they seem....

5. The inner sole of the shoe features French writing. Again in reference to point 4, any designer that considers the whole of the shoe and adds a cute touch somewhere usually left alone, like the insole, gets big points for me. It's like the opposite of a Louboutin, having a signature style feature on the inner-sole. Plus - it's in French! There's nothing more appealing that something in French. How clever is that!

Leggings as Pants

This has long be an issue that I have protested and advocated against time and time again and will continue to do so until it stops – leggings, tights, longjohns, thermals, whatever you want to call them, DON’T WEAR THEM AS PANTS!!!!

Unless, of course, you are going to the gym and intend to work out in them (in which case they would then be gym pants), otherwise there is no excuse as to why they would be worn as pants.

There are a number of good reasons why the aforementioned fashion infringement should not happen, however I will only mention the most important: IT. LOOKS. BAD.

I have seen super skinny supermodel-ish thin girls wear these, and they still emphasise the lower body region beyond their actual proportions. Realistically, they are not flattering. On anyone.

And too often I have seen poor little things trying out this ‘look’, not realising that the leg adornments they are wearing are see-through, and everyone walking within their parametres is copping a nasty eyeful of underwear (and of course it’s always the day the unaware one is wearing her 15 year old Tweetie undies).

Come on peoples, you would be embarrassed if your skirts was caught in your tights and you were showing off your knickers to the whole world, so why do it voluntarily?

So, a few rules to follow the next time you consider showing off your tights-covered pins:

1. Don’t wear them as pants - what you wear on top has to fall at least to mid-thigh. 

2. Don’t wear them as pants, unless you are going to the gym. 

3. Finally, just don’t wear them as pants. 

Got it? Good.

Lorna Jane 'Amy' Full Length Tight $89.99
(For Exercising ONLY)
http://www.lornajane.com.au

A Royal fly on the royal (tropical) wall

Maybe it's because the royal wedding has sparked a new found obsession with the Royal family (really, if you dig around there are so many scandalous tales plaguing the Mountbatten-Windsors, which I love!! Also, someone told me the other day that some younger uni students she was talking to didn't know Queen Lizzie had a husband. I say shame on them).

Or maybe it's because it's about 10 degrees outside and I am lamenting the cold weather considering it isn't winter yet.

Or maybe it's because I am extremely competitive and always like to do/buy/eat something that makes other people envious and makes me feel special because I was the one that got to do/buy/eat it.

Well, for any (or all) of the above reasons, today I would rather be in Seychelles, at the $6,000 a night private hideaway that Kate and Wills have reportedly chosen as their honeymoon destination. Imagine how fun that would be - listening in closely and finding out exactly what they thought of Princess Bea's wedding headwear (poor poppet).

Thanks The Age